in focus

June 23, 2007 at 11:34 am (celise downs, events, In the News, life in general)

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i totally hate wearing glasses. but mine are kinda funky, so im cool with that. but there are people out there that really need them and cant afford them. celise is donating a book this cause, so if shes willing, then all you other childrens book authors should too. check it out:

Please join our celebrity donors Paul Newman, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Matt Dillon in helping us transform lives. New Eyes for the Needy helps the less fortunate see clearly by providing new eyeglasses to poor Americans and distributing donated recycled glasses overseas. We are proud of our 75-year legacy of providing clear vision to those in need. The prescription eyeglasses we provide enable children to succeed in school, senior citizens to continue living independently, and working-poor adults to maintain employment.

In the past year, New Eyes has purchased more than 5,500 pairs of eyeglasses for poor Americans. In addition, we distributed 350,000+ pairs of recycled eyeglasses to indigent people around the world. We will celebrate the 75th Anniversary of New Eyes with our “Hocus Focus” gala on Saturday, October 20, 2007 at the Beacon Hill Club in Summit, New Jersey. The evening features dinner, live musical entertainment, and live and silent auctions.

Our auction will include autographed children’s books, and we respectfully ask you to contribute a signed copy of one of your books. Gala proceeds will be utilized to purchase prescription glasses for needy Americans, helping them attain clear vision and self-sufficiency.

Thank you very much for your consideration.

Respectfully,

Pamela DePompo-Klein, Executive Director, New Eyes for the Needy
549 Millburn Avenue, PO Box 332
Short Hills, NJ 07078
973-376-4908

cmon, come in. im on the case.

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do you know where your kids are?

June 10, 2007 at 12:22 pm (In the News, life in general, The Company, The Job)

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i saw this on yahoo headlines today: Kid-finding phones

the cons:

“Of course, a locator service won’t help if your child turns the phone off (or if the battery goes dead.”

“When Katie was supposed to be at a friend’s, her Sprint phone placed her at a nearby mall. Carroll phoned her daughter’s pal’s home and learned that Katie was indeed there.

The problem, according to Sprint: When the phone cannot receive a GPS signal, such as in basements or windowless rooms, locations have to be triangulated from cell-phone towers, which give far cruder readings.” – this was after phones from three different services offering this feature was given to a family with three teenage girls.

the pros:

“GPS is typically accurate to within a few yards, whether your kid is at the end of the block or running away to New York City.”

so, hmmm. The Company tried to give me a cell phone when i started with them. probably for this very reason. but i refused. and waited until my monthly allowance kicked in to buy one myself. i realize they have other ways of keeping tabs on me. theres probably bugs and cameras all over my apartment…

(glancing around said place)

i wonder if spy headquarters is open today.

cmon, come in. im on the case

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flipping the birdie…okay, not really

May 23, 2007 at 6:30 pm (celise downs, In the News, some introspection)

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celise sent me this article today. shes funny that way. sending me articles that she thinks i should read. she says her mother used to do that with her and her older siser when they were living by themselves. she still does it, actually, she just saves the newspaper for them when they go over to visit. lol. i like celises parents. theyre great.

 so it seems that celise is getting into the habit of sending them to me now. like some kind of family tradition or something. so, yeah, for the record my ring finger is longer than my index finger. but im good at both subjects. so does that mean im special? or just a freak of nature?

what about you?

cmon, come in. im on the case.

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say what?

May 9, 2007 at 8:52 pm (In the News, some introspection)

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i saw this in the yahoo headlines toda: Study: Young girls more likely to be fat.

so here are my two suggestions:

1) ban barbie. its obvious these girls are spending too much time playing dress up.

2) make p.e. in the schools mandatory. and none of that hokey square dancing crap that celise had to go thru way back in the day. do something with a lot of running around like kickball, raquetball, tennis or volleyball. not that i would know much about this P.E. thing, seeing as how i was homeschooled and now attend a charter school. but, y’know, ive heard rumors.

 im just sayin’.

C’mon, come in. im on the case.

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Breast size has nothing to do with it…REALLY

May 9, 2007 at 8:34 pm (In the News, some introspection)

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saw this DEAR ABBY letter on yahoo entertainment today: 

DEAR ABBY: This may seem like a dumb question, but I really need to know the answer. Can you get pregnant when your breasts are still underdeveloped? My boyfriend says you can’t, but I need to know for sure. I’m afraid to keep birth control in my room because my little sister, who I have to share a room with, constantly snoops through my stuff when I’m not there. She would be sure to show it to our parents if she found it because she loves to get me in trouble, so I really need to know the answer to this. — QUESTIONING IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR QUESTIONING: There is no such thing as a “dumb” question. Your boyfriend is mistaken. Breast development has nothing to do with whether a girl can become pregnant. The onset of a young woman’s menstrual cycle has everything to do with it. Under no circumstances should you have unprotected sex. Not only will it place you at risk for pregnancy, but also for sexually transmitted infections.

dear abby says theres no such thing as a dumb question, but im sorry…

THIS IS CLEARLY A DUMB QUESTION.

im a 16 yr old virgin–hey, i ain’t got nothin’ to hide. sort of–and even i know that…

THIS IS CLEARLY A DUMB QUESTION.

if this girl was old enough to handle sex, she would know that…

THIS IS CLEARLY A DUMB QUESTION.

who all here can clearly see this girl is too young to be having sex? raise your hand.

who all here thinks the girl should kick her immature boyfriend to the curb for saying something so stupid in the first place? raise your hand.

 who all here thinks dear abby shouldve added a post-it note like: “but you really should wait until youre MATURE enough to have sex?” raise your hand.

who all here thinks we should track this girl down, slap her silly, then tell her mother about the BC pills? raise your hand.

who all here wants to know how she got the BC pills in the first place? raise your hand. [im probably all cavegurl about this, me being a virgin and all, but really, how is this possible? dont you have to be a certain age? arent these pills prescribed by doctors?]

who all here wants to know why the mother hasnt had “the birds and the bees” and the “you’ll be a woman soon” discussion with this girl? raise your hand.

who all here wants to know what backwoods school in oklahoma isnt teaching their kids sex ed? raise your hand.

yeah. me too. 

cmon, come in. im on the case.

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How cute is this?

May 2, 2007 at 11:51 pm (GQ, In the News, Party Gurl, some introspection, TVLand, Uncategorized)

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In Yahoo headlines today Disney Unveils social network for preteens.

How cute is this? And I mean that in a purely sarcastic way. So, this is like MySpace Disney, for kids 14 and under.

The preteens.

The preteens who already have a page on MySpace and thirty thousand friends to go with it.

The preteens who already have an up-all-night page on MySpace that are now going to gravitate towards a 9 o’clock-lights-out curfew on MySpace Disney.

Uh. Huh.

Not that I’m knockin’ Disney (love the movies, love the theme parks) or the Disney Channel. Quite the contrary:

“Hello, my name is Draven Atreides and I’m a former That’s So Raven addict. I’ve been clean for three years and counting.”

Notice how we kinda have the same name? Coincidence, I assure you. My stories will end up on the Disney Channel some day–mark my words–and the kidlets will have to get used to a new name…and a new girl. Party Girl, GQ, get your bags packed, cuz Hollywood, here we come!

Blink. Blink. Ahem.

Sorry. Got lost there for a moment. Seriously, I think it’s a great idea what they’re trying to do. What with all the sexual predators trolling through cyberspace these days, parents have to come up with new ways to protect their kids. I just think that when a kid hits the age of 14, it’s going to be all over but the cryin’ and they’re going to want to upgrade to the real deal.

I’m just sayin’.

Come on, come in. I’m on the case.

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