road trip

June 27, 2007 at 10:17 am (celise downs, life in general)

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so, celise and her hubby are leaving today to go to a family reunion in houston. shell be back early monday morning.

six adults in a mini-van.

a 16-hr drive. probably longer because you know how guys always have to use the bathroom more than girls.

 im in charge until she gets back. whooooo-hoooooo!

SLEEPOVER!

cmon, come in. im on the case.

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oops, her bad

June 26, 2007 at 10:55 pm (celise downs, life in general)

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so, celise created a major boo-boo:

SHE ACCIDENTALLY DELETED HER AUTHOR WEBSITE!!!

yeah. for reals. the whole thing. yeah, i know. way to go there, miss author lady. your obsessive cleaning habits got you in trouble once again.

she was cleaning up some old files and her index finger kept spasming over the delete key and the next thing she knows her site is poof! be gone!

to say that shes freakin’ out right now would be major understatement. shes been calling harrassing emailing her web designer to find out if it can be fixed. the Computer Goddess is smiling on celise this week. her site can be restored.

too bad its taking so freakin’ long. shes going out of town on thursday–family reunion. thanks for not inviting me–and i guarantee you shes going to grow another gray hair on this trip worrying about when the IT geeks are going to fix it. girlfren’, alls i got to say is this:

take a deep breath.

count to ten.

throw in a few hail hail marys to the Computer Goddess.

have fun on your vacation.

cmon, come in. im on the case

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in focus

June 23, 2007 at 11:34 am (celise downs, events, In the News, life in general)

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i totally hate wearing glasses. but mine are kinda funky, so im cool with that. but there are people out there that really need them and cant afford them. celise is donating a book this cause, so if shes willing, then all you other childrens book authors should too. check it out:

Please join our celebrity donors Paul Newman, Leonardo DiCaprio, and Matt Dillon in helping us transform lives. New Eyes for the Needy helps the less fortunate see clearly by providing new eyeglasses to poor Americans and distributing donated recycled glasses overseas. We are proud of our 75-year legacy of providing clear vision to those in need. The prescription eyeglasses we provide enable children to succeed in school, senior citizens to continue living independently, and working-poor adults to maintain employment.

In the past year, New Eyes has purchased more than 5,500 pairs of eyeglasses for poor Americans. In addition, we distributed 350,000+ pairs of recycled eyeglasses to indigent people around the world. We will celebrate the 75th Anniversary of New Eyes with our “Hocus Focus” gala on Saturday, October 20, 2007 at the Beacon Hill Club in Summit, New Jersey. The evening features dinner, live musical entertainment, and live and silent auctions.

Our auction will include autographed children’s books, and we respectfully ask you to contribute a signed copy of one of your books. Gala proceeds will be utilized to purchase prescription glasses for needy Americans, helping them attain clear vision and self-sufficiency.

Thank you very much for your consideration.

Respectfully,

Pamela DePompo-Klein, Executive Director, New Eyes for the Needy
549 Millburn Avenue, PO Box 332
Short Hills, NJ 07078
973-376-4908

cmon, come in. im on the case.

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I Spy Fridays: Snitch Tip #6

June 22, 2007 at 1:13 pm (Chief, I Spy Friday, snitching, The Company, The Job)

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be sure to have a trusted contact person

and no, im not talking about your best friend, the bum on the street or the barista behind the counter at the starbucks you go to every morning. im talking about the person who goes and reports back to someone official. someone whos not going to screw you over by turning you in. ya know, like on those cops shows? all the cops have a trusted source on the street and they always go to that source because they know the word. and that trusted source will always trust that cop because theyve never given up a name. see what i mean?

Chief is my trusted person. i know what he does for a living. its because of what he does that made me seek him out in the first place. and because of the person i am, Chief would cut off his own arm before screwing me over. but he was different. he was the deal breaker. no Chief, no agreement with The Company.

trusted sources dont have to be in an official capacity, though, like cops. newspaper reporters are pretty cool. or so ive heard. and those reporters on your local tv new stations arent exactly alien lifeforms. just sayin’.

cmon, come in. im on the case

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lighting a fire under the butt

June 20, 2007 at 6:43 pm (book stuff, Book Two, celise downs, life in general, The Series)

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um, hel-lo, celise? mrs author lady? youre stalling. you havent written anything in nearly three weeks. whats up with that? youre supposed to be writing everyday. at least one page. you havent picked up your quicker clicker (that would be a mechanical pencil for all you non-writers out there) in weeks.

im sure i dont have to remind you that you have a deadline coming up.

but im going to anyway. its aug 31st. 66 pages.

whatve you got so far, huh? HUH?

yeah, thats what i thought. todays the 20th, celise. in two weeks its going to be july. are ya plannin’ on cracking open that notebook again anytime soon? cuz right now, you totally suck at this daily goal thing.

now…put down the romance book before i set it on fire.

 cmon, come in. im on the case (maybe. possibly. we’ll see. check back later)

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I Spy Fridays: Snitch Tip #9

June 15, 2007 at 1:33 pm (I Spy Friday, snitching, The Other Job)

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Have another job to fall back on.

which is why i havent been posting more regularly. ive been working the Other job at the daycare almost everyday after school. sometimes on weekends, too. its always important to have another job to fall back on when youre snitching. this gives you something to talk about with your friends. besides, your friends will probably have jobs too and you dont want to look like a complete idiot when their talking about their jobs and you dont have one. you dont want them to think youll be hanging on to mommy and daddys pockets forever, right?

cmon, come in. im on the case.

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do you know where your kids are?

June 10, 2007 at 12:22 pm (In the News, life in general, The Company, The Job)

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i saw this on yahoo headlines today: Kid-finding phones

the cons:

“Of course, a locator service won’t help if your child turns the phone off (or if the battery goes dead.”

“When Katie was supposed to be at a friend’s, her Sprint phone placed her at a nearby mall. Carroll phoned her daughter’s pal’s home and learned that Katie was indeed there.

The problem, according to Sprint: When the phone cannot receive a GPS signal, such as in basements or windowless rooms, locations have to be triangulated from cell-phone towers, which give far cruder readings.” – this was after phones from three different services offering this feature was given to a family with three teenage girls.

the pros:

“GPS is typically accurate to within a few yards, whether your kid is at the end of the block or running away to New York City.”

so, hmmm. The Company tried to give me a cell phone when i started with them. probably for this very reason. but i refused. and waited until my monthly allowance kicked in to buy one myself. i realize they have other ways of keeping tabs on me. theres probably bugs and cameras all over my apartment…

(glancing around said place)

i wonder if spy headquarters is open today.

cmon, come in. im on the case

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I Spy Friday: Snitch Tip #8

June 8, 2007 at 1:00 am (Uncategorized)

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payment first, information second.

ok, so im sure youve seen those cop shows where the cop tries to get information from a bartender or something and the guy says something like “well, i dunno. he could’ve had brown hair or black hair.” hes a bartender, of course hes seen the perp. hes just stalling because he knows that the info he’s got is important enough to help with the case.

as a snitch, anything and everything you have to say will be very important. always. maybe not at that certain point in time, but it will come in handy later on. i swear. knowledge is power and it comes with a price. make sure you know its worth and the get the moolah before saying a word.

cmonm, come in. im on the case.

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new job

June 7, 2007 at 6:06 pm (life in general, The Job, The Other Job)

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okay so you may or may not know but i got a new job at a daycare. no, not The Job (ya know, the one with The Company?), just The Other Job. i had to get away from the manager and the other fluffball employees at charlies muse. i was afraid i was going to turn into one of them: a giggling, gum-chewing, fluffball who only cares about what outfits shes going to buy with her store discount. ugh. so not me. the only fashion i need to know is that i can wear baby phat jeans because they were made for people like me. so, yea i know watching other peoples’ kiddies can be a hassle but its actually quite entertaining!!!  well not at first because on my first day my co-worker, EX-Blonde, totally had a melt down on me and i had no idea what to do!!! so we were cleaning up for the night when out of no where she starts bawling!!!

 “what the heck is wrong with this basketcase??” those were my first thoughts and then next thing i know she has her arms wrapped around me and is sobbing  into my shoulder!!! “um…” those were my exact words. i didnt even know this girls name!!!!! and she must have been able to read my mind because she started apologizing for being such a basket case!! she was saying something about how she hates this job and she wants a cigarette or something. i could barely understand her between the loud crying and the fact that she was still holding on to me. can we say awkward moment, boys and girls??!! 

and no one could save me because it was just the two of us ALONE in the room… um yea. eventually she pulled herself together …BARELY…. and i went home with wet snot on my shoulder from a practical stanger! what triggered this melt down??? good question but i suspect that part of it was from pms but still CAN WE GET A GRIP???? I MEAN COME ON!!!!!  she’s what 20 years old? 19? whatever. i dont know but im sure that this wasnt her first visit from aunt flo (if you know what i mean), if she doesnt know how to control herself now, i dont think she ever will…..*sigh* i love first-day-on-the-job-days. 

cmon, come in. im on the case.

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it’s her birthday, it’s her birthday

June 6, 2007 at 5:47 pm (A Royale Pain, A Whole Latte Trouble, Book One, Book Two, celise downs)

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yesterday, that is. celise turned…ow, that hurt (rubs arm where I was pinched). hey, no need to get violent woman. she wont let me say how old she is, but you wouldnt beleive me anyway if i told you. 

 she had a great day. how do i know this, because i spent the day with her.

NOT!

the bitch, uh miss author lady had a spa day and didnt even invite me to come with. i see how it is. im good enough to put in books, but not take to a spa, is that it?

oh. right.

i forgot about that. the free spa day i got in book one.

ahem

so……her website got a makeover and shes giving away prizes until sunday. go check it out.

im going to go sit in the corner over here and put my other foot in my mouth.

 cmon, come in. im on the case.

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